BEing in 2019

Jan 1

When thinking about what I wanted to bring into this new year, I reflected on what 2018 has meant to me.

So many lessons, challenging and fulfilling experiences, beautiful connections with like-hearted humans. And the most impactful message I received at the end of 2017, which was “let go”. So i’ve been doing just that:

letting go of who I thought I was supposed to be in order to be loved, successful, to belong, to be fulfilled.

I have been letting go of the way I think things should look/unfold (or that I’m comfortable with) and accepting them for whatever they actually are. As a result, my journey home to myself has unfolded in a major way; every time I release, an unlocking occurs. Stripping away the layers and locks and barriers that have kept me from showing up as my authentic, vulnerable and powerful self.

Letting go continues to call my name; letting go of control, of attachment, of fear, at times with a smile on my face and ease in my body, and others…well let’s just say, not so gracefully (insert eye roll here). So while it was the theme of 2018, it’s definitely being taken into 2019 as a compliment to what it is that i’m calling in.

There have been multiple death’s happening within my psyche, over the past 22 months really, but in 2018 I finally began to embrace and allow the painful and beautiful ways they move and change me; and how VITAL they truly are. These death’s are what are bringing me into 2019. They are the darkness I’ve been stumbling my way through, and with each death and period of darkness I spend rolling around in the muck, emotional turmoil, and uncertainty, a rebirth occurs. Each new beginning brings me one step closer, to ME. The darkness has brought me into the light and letting go has created the space for me to show up and stop playing small.

I am stepping over the threshold, from a year that has brought high high’s and low low’s; the most intense growth of my life led by experiencing true, deep, soul shifting love, heartbreak, travel, adventure; so much I have a hard time organizing it in my mind, but my heart knows. This felt experience continues to unfold and I’m stepping into 2019, head held high, heart still a bit bruised, but ready… ready for what is for me.

This year is about being, it’s not a doing.

It doesn’t mean I don’t do, but it means I listen and move in alignment with what and where my truth, my love, my purpose, is calling for me to BE. The movement (otherwise know as the doing) follows, it need not lead. This is a big year for me. I can feel it. It terrifies and excites me. But it is going to be made by trust and allowing and a bit more letting go ;).

And that’s exactly what 2019 is calling for me to be: in trust and allowing.

Allowing that which I desire the most to find the way to me. Trusting the deep and powerful intuitive messages I receive constantly. Listening and being willing to receive whatever they are, without attachment to where that may lead me. Trust, allow. Allow, trust, and more letting go.

For those of you feeling overwhelmed already on January 1st, I share this as a reminder to check in with your Truth. How often do you allow yourself to just be? How often do you listen to the pull to slow down and reassess your trajectory? How often do you judge or feel guilt when you say “no” to others and “yes” to your Self?

This is my invitation to you. Get present. TO YOU. Love yourself so luxuriously that all that love and vital energy pours off of you and fills up every space you occupy.

Allow your true magic to flow.

Allow yourself to receive.

Allow yourself to BE.

No matter what your goals, aspirations and visions of the future hold, you will achieve what you ALLOW through being in alignment with your truth, your love; through trusting your Self and using that to guide you.

So, I have one more question I invite you to consider…

If you were to look back at the end of this amazing life; you, all wisdom and gray hair and wrinkles— physical signs that you have truly lived and learned the lessons along the way— out of everything done, achieved, accomplished, what is it that TRULY MATTERED?

Whatever those things are… do more of that.

This life is meant to be lived. This life is yours to create and choose. You deserve it. You are worthy.

Allow. Trust.

So in this year, my year of allowing and trusting (and some more letting go), I’m choosing what matters… to live my life leading with love, open hearted, and vulnerable. I am living my purpose and designing the life that allows me to BE exactly who I am. I am creating safe spaces, I am empowering every person I meet to step into their greatness and I am helping guide them home. I’m so excited for what is BEING created!